How to Deal with Inferiority Complex

Musa GumedeIt’s soul-destroying, isn’t it? Feeling inferior transforms every day into just one more crushing experience. Another day on the sidelines losing hopes that you’ll never get your turn to shine, or even fit in.
It leaves you consumed with self-disappointment.
It’s no wonder you feel insignificant, inadequate, a total bother to others. Inferiority is a hideous place to be. Oh gosh! it’s hell. I was trapped there for the greater part of my life, until my early teens. Then I decided to work out what made me feel so much less confident than everyone else.
Thankfully, I beat inferiority into submission. So let me show you how to coax your self-confidence out of the corner and say howdy to your positive self-belief.
1. Gain Self-Confidence By Being Your Self.
Find your self-identity and find your self-confidence. “Self-confidence”. There’s a clue in the word. It’s self confidence, not some other person‘s confidence. Once you start being yourself, you will stop feeling inferior in any situation. Remember, the only thing NO ONE on this planet can do better than you … is being YOU. Only Dr. Seuss put it much better: “Today you are You, that is truer than true. There is no one alive who is Youer than You!”
Or if you prefer:
Oscar Wilde said, “Be yourself. Everyone else is taken.” No, I don’t know you, but I can promise if we ever meet, I will prefer you as the authentic you. You are doing the world a disservice by hiding your true self.
Secret to self-confidence #1:
You will always be a poor imitation of anyone else. Stop hankering after being someone you’re not. Be yourself. Be unique.

2. Know That Inferiority Is A Choice. So Is Equality.
So the first thing we need to be clear on here is that feeling inferior is normal. Why? Because it shows that you aren’t deluded. Let’s be honest; most of us are inferior to someone in some way. Last time I checked my bank account, I was financially inferior to most people on the Forbes 400 list – ok, everyone on the list. You see, the need for validation is a normal, healthy aspect of being human. But seeking validation by comparing yourself to others is a poor tool for building self-confidence. There will always be areas where you feel inferior, rightly, or even wrongly. Why? Because most of us have a tendency to focus on the negative, which translates into noticing our perceived inferiorities and overlooking our strengths. So unless your actual life aim is to be richer than Patrice Motsepe or Raymond Ackerman, stay away from comparisons in all fields. By refusing to compare yourself to others, you’re choosing equality over inferiority. Remember, no one on this earth is less important or valuable than any other human being … unless they decide they are.
Secret to self-confidence #2:
Stop comparing yourself to others. Focus on your own ideals when measuring your strengths and weaknesses. We are all as valid as each other in our own way.
3. Take Yourself Out Of The Equation.
What? Having told you to find your self-identity and be yourself, I’m now telling you to forget about you altogether? Not exactly. What I’m saying is that when confronted by someone who has previously left you feeling inferior, focus on them and them alone. Leave yourself outside the door. By devoting your full attention to the other person, you will have the headspace to hear what they are honestly saying, at the very heart of their words. Listen hard; you’ll hear their own fears, worries, insecurities and disappointments articulated. You’ll have the capacity to clearly observe their body language. Watch carefully; you’ll see their own nerves, stress points, frustrations, and deep-down desires acted out. They will inadvertently reveal the real them, right there, laid bare in front of you. And you know, you probably won’t recognize them as the superior being you previously held them up to be.
In fact, you’re more likely to see them as a person, just like you. An imperfect human being. Equal maybe, but not superior.

Secret to self-confidence #3:
Take yourself out of the equation. Focus on the other person, and see what imperfections they reveal. You’ll find a vulnerable human being, just like you.
Get rid of your feelings of inferiority once and for all
Small, simple changes to your thinking can break the negative cycle of feeling inferior for good. Imagine feeling confident talking to anyone. Imagine feeling part of the group, a valued contributor. Imagine never pretending again. Imagine actually being YOU. Stop letting your feelings of inferiority overpower you. Fight back with these powerful tips to give you the self-confidence you need to rock your world.
Musa Gumede
www.musagumede.co.za

Moving from Subsistence Farming to Commercial Farming

Picture Credits: www.morguefile.com

Picture Credits: www.morguefile.com

Normally when I’m at home, in South Coast of KZN my granny has made it a tradition to give me crops or harvest from her garden.  This goes as far as giving me the entire fowl that she is breeding at home. I like that because it makes her feel content that her children are enjoying her hard work from the garden. For me because it’s something that I grew up enjoying for many years at home, I sometimes encourage her to sell her harvest to get money. The problem I always encounter when I raise that suggestion to her is that, she is not farming or growing her crops with an intention of selling them, it’s for us to eat only. Sometimes mealies become dry fast while we are still enjoying it. On yearly basis we always have oversupply of “amadumbe”. It is not in her to sell all of these things, because she is not regarding herself as a commercial farmer. Recently I came back from home with 10 KG of Sugar Beans, Peanuts, Amadumbe, Butternut, Herbs and whole chicken. All this from her garden, and when I look the value of these items it can be about R1000.00.
She is not alone in this, each and every neighbor has his or her own garden growing the same thing and they keep it to themselves. Although they have their own gardens, there is still an unused piece of land that has a potential of becoming a framing land. Looking at this and taking into account that as a country at times we even struggle to produce enough mealies for our nation I always see a lost opportunity to make profit and to feed the nation.
I believe there should be a transition from people like my granny to move from subsistence farming into commercial farming at a small scale.  I’m not faultless as well in all of this, because in fact she should have seen me selling some of her crops and give back the money for her to see how profitable her small land can be.
Things like honey, we import large quantity of it from other countries, whereas we have the capacity to produce our own in the country. Maybe it’s about time to get dirty and work on the soil or be even stunk by those bees.
By: Musa Gumede

Local Restaurateurs Stimulates Local Economy

One of these days from my early meeting at Ramsgate lower south coast of KZN I had to stop by Shelly Beach for a light meal. My first meal of the day I’m always fussy about it as it has to be perfect and delicious at the same time. I had a choice of going to normal franchise restaurant or to the boutique restaurant.  The normal assumption with the franchise restaurants is that they try by all means to look identical and they all conform to the standards and requirements of the franchise. Maybe for a person who believe that he must eat what he knows these franchise restaurants might be the way to go.
However I always look something unique about the area every time, I’m also from South Coast. I have seen business people or families investing in small or medium size boutique restaurants within the area.  I personally think that it’s  something that should be encourage, because if a tourist is in the area would like to have a different taste that can be offered in that area only. These kinds of restaurants offer that to the public.
For local economy I personally think restaurants that are owner or family driven are better stimulants of the local economy as opposed to others. I say this simply because there is no money that leaks back to the franchise principals for marketing, percentage of the turnover, franchises fees, etc.
Most of the things in franchise restaurants are centralized, quality control, menu and so on. So if as customer you are not satisfied about something that is beyond them, it’s too tough you must find another venue for yourself to eat. This makes it difficult for effect change in these restaurants, because it’s a long process that need to be followed.
The choice is yours though as a consumer and the recipient of the service. We always like to go to where we are treated with respect, enjoy nice food and good environment at the same time. However the question will be what unique you can take out from that particular restaurant? It is always highly possible to get unique setup and taste from proprietor orientated business.

By: Musa Gumede
www.musagumede.co.za

We are compelled to be only consumers

Small BusinessDuring this time our economy is under a lot of stress it’s the time where the world community needs to look all the loopholes in the economic strategies of the country as to ensure that we build a stronger foundation for the future. We always encourage people to engage themselves in business to better themselves, communities around them and positively contribute to the country’s economy.
In the past years we have seen people investing their money by buying a slice in the ownership of big companies out there. This is the way of getting into business and investing your money. However in this way the investor sit back and looks how the company he or she invested in performs. Although shareholders are called to votes when companies are making decisions, however I think this way of investing is too individualistic.
The reason I’m saying this it’s because it does not directly create the employment to our community which is struggling in finding jobs to eradicate poverty and furthermore is does not provide with entrepreneurial skills to the person involve. Specifically in Africa we faced with poverty, illiteracy, etc. To have more entrepreneurs will help in making families of African have decent income. When taking your R500 000 and buy shares with it, and get dividend at the end of the financial year, think again of opening a small factory, business where you might employ about ten people. In that way you have secured yourself a good investment and you have provided employment to other people. Isn’t that good?
The other problem that we are facing here in South African is that it is very easy to get credit for consumer goods. You can find person earning R1500.00 per month being allowed to buy on credit expensive furniture, cell phone contract and other goods. However if a person earning the same amount go to the financial institution asking for a business loan for a mini tuck shop he want to open it is very hard for them to finance the proposal. This kind of situation is bad as it makes the finance out of reach for people who want to start their own businesses. This is where the government of the day can intervene to make the situation conducive for potential entrepreneurs to enter into business.
According to southafrican.info website there are 2.4 million of registered SMME’s in South African, accounting to 40% of the country’s Gross Domestic Product (GDP). Few will deny the positive contribution of SMME’s to the economy.

By Musa Gumede